Without a predetermined path to follow, achieving your goals becomes a bit hit or miss. When you create a success blueprint from the start and plan out the precise direction you are going and how to get there though, things become much more organized and straightforward. I call this planning ‘The Magic W System’ and it’s a great way to set you on a direct path to what you want to achieve.

For this purpose of writing I am going to use the example of starting up a home based business but it can be applied to anything that has a set goal in mind.

What? At the very beginning you have to ask yourself what it is that you really want. You need to think out exactly what it is you are aiming to achieve. Don’t be vague here and just say ‘I want a new car’. You need to be clear on exactly what car you want. The colour, the make, model, engine size, the extras package it comes with, the type and size of the rims and tyres, the size of the sound system….everything! The more clearly you define your exact goal the easier it is to visualise having it and this is what you should be aiming for. By visualising achieving your goal with a picture clear image of it in your mind you create a sense of excitement and positivity inside you. The more you can imagine it, the better. So think of what you want as many things as it might be, and describe them exactly.

Why? Next, ask yourself why you want to achieve your goals. You have to make sure that your goals are YOUR GOALS and you know just why you are working towards them. Quitting smoking is a good example of this. You can get nagged by everyone to quit, and no doubt you’ve thought about it, but until it becomes YOUR goal want to quit you’ll find it hard to. So make sure your goals are clear to you. Understand why you want to hit them and what will happen when you do. You may say you want to own your own home and pay off the mortgage so you can put the kids through college in 5 years. Your goal is clear and gives you more incentive to achieve it.

Write! This is the powerful part. Write it all down. Write what you want and why you want it. When you can see this on paper it takes on an even stronger form. It becomes that little bit more real now as you see it looking back at you in fine detail, exactly what you are now working towards. You can also read this list of goals anytime when its written down and reaffirm to yourself just what it is that you are aiming towards whenever you need a bit of boost in your incentive. I always like to read my goals just before I go to bed and when I wake up in the morning. It’s the constant affirmation to yourself of why you are working and what is at the end of it all that really makes you push yourself forward.

When? Now that you have a clear idea of what you want and why all written down in front of you the next step is to give all of this a time frame. When do you intend to have these goals done by. Think back to working for your boss again. If you were just given the work and he said to just give it back when it’s done, god knows when he’d get it. With no time frame to have things done by there is no urgency to complete them and without that you soon lose focus on getting things done.

So formulating a timeline for every goal is crucial. Look at what you want to achieve and split them up into immediate goals, short term and long term. What do you want to have done in a week, a month, a year or 5 years? Be realistic though. Don’t put unrealistic expectation on yourself that is simply impossible to achieve. This will just put an unnecessary strain on yourself and make you feel a failure when you can’t meet your own deadline. So think about things realistically and plan ahead.

What will you give? Ask yourself what you are willing to give to get what you want. Everyone knows you have to make sacrifice when you want something, be it free time, your favourite TV show, going out with your friends or whatever. Basically you are going to have to give up something you like and trade that time for your goal achievement. If you say you will give 2 hours extra a night and 4 at the weekends then make sure you stick to that! If you find yourself slacking off look back at your list of goals and time line to have them by and reaffirm this to yourself. You have to be hard on yourself so make sure you stick to what you agreed to with yourself!

Work..Make it happen! Now you have your plan of action in front of you, your success blueprint as I like to call it, make it work. Having all the best intention in the world is great, but without any work happening from you it’s never going to happen. Look at everything you want, the time frame to have it by and what you want to give to have it all, and write out a plan of how each one of these is going to be achieved and then make it work! Stick to your plan and keep your goals in mind and success is as good as guaranteed.

Failure is an event, not a person.

-Zig Ziglar

Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

-Confucius

Give Yourself Freedom to Fail

Where does failure live? Does it have an address? When was it born? Who are failures parents? All of the above questions are absurd! Like the inspirational speaker and author Zig Ziglar states: “Failure is only an event.” Nothing else. If it becomes anything more than that, it’s only because you have decided to make it more. You see, friend, there is not a single person alive who has not experienced the painful event of failure.

When I was in college, I took a business statistics class that was so difficult for me that I would have nightmares about it. I found myself waking up in the middle of the night because I was having a terrible dream about some of the formulas and theories that I had to know for exams and projects. I had never studied so hard for a class only to fail miserably on ever exam, except one. (That’s right, I only passed one exam the entire course, and on the one that I did pass, I think the professor passed me only because he felt sorry for me).

When my semester grades arrived in the mail, I immediately looked for my statistics grade and there it was—a giant D. That’s right, a D. My attendance and daily assignments landed me the passing grade. If you’d seen my reaction upon discovering this, you would have thought I just made the dean’s list. I was jumping up and down, racing around my house. You may be wondering how anyone could be so ecstatic about a D, one grade above failing. In many people’s eyes, this would be considered failure. But not in my eyes, because God knows I gave that class every ounce of energy and focus that I could muster. When you put all you’ve got into something, what more can you give? Failure is inevitable in one’s quest for success. I may have received a D for that statistics class, but the education that I received about myself was priceless. I’ve learned that failure serves as a strong foundation for success when you allow these trying times to teach you.

Failure simply tells you what doesn’t work?

Have you ever tried to open your car door with very little light and your hands are somewhat full. You try one key after another until you find the correct one. You open the door put in your things and you’re on your way. Most people wouldn’t stop trying only after one or two failures from their keys. They would keep trying because with each “failure” they know that they are getting closer to their desired outcome. In other words failure is simply finding out which key doesn’t work.

Others will Remind You

Anytime you attempt “BIG” things in life you have to be prepared to deal with people. You see, people are often the main reasons that many people quit after receiving feedback from failure. These people hardly ever fail because they rarely attempt anything “BIG” so to avoid failure. The thing that you have to remember is that if you’re failing then your at least doing something; unlike those pitiful souls that attempt nothing at all!

Look for Answers

A fantastic way to deal with failure (feedback) is to seek answers from the situation. You can always find answers if you look hard enough. As a former athlete I always looked the hardest after a loss because you can learn more in a loss than you can in a win but you can’t be afraid of what you’ll find. Be diligent and aggressive in finding answers during failure.

Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses. ~ George Washington Carver

There never was and there never will be another person exactly like you. Your way of thinking, your appearance, you inherent talents and interests, your skills are like no other. You have untapped potential inside you yet to be discovered and released. As Og Mandino would say, you are “nature’s greatest miracle.” Are you living like the successful person you were born to be? That is, are you applying yourself to reach higher, do better, give your all, and be your best?

We can learn a great deal about how to do this by looking at people like George Washington Carver, an American scientist and inventor. He was born into slavery and experienced many hardships that could have kept him from fulfilling his potential. A childhood disease left him frail and unable to work on the fields. Instead, his interest in plants drove him to learn as much as he could about them. He was denied admission to a university because of his race, but that did not stop him. He kept trying and believing. He did not allow rejection, bitterness, or injustice to thwart his drive to be his best. Five years later, he got accepted to another college. Carver kept pushing himself to succeed. The potential inside of him would not lie dormant. Rather, he discovered it; and in the process, he revolutionized agricultural science. Today he is well known for his many contributions and discoveries of hundreds of uses for the peanut and other crops.

What makes one’s life a success story when there are so many good excuses to fall far below our potential, and so many good reasons to fail? According to George Washington Carver, the majority of failures come from “the habit of making excuses.” What was Carver’s excuse? He could have listed them! So what is our excuse?

Following are 6 common excuses for failure:

1. We fail when we are not true to ourselves. That is, we do not value our uniqueness and all that we have to offer. We may not realize the tremendous potential inside of us until we accept that we are special and loved. This above all, to thine own self be true. ~William Shakespeare

2. We fail when we feel sorry for ourselves. Self-pity keeps us from trying or believing we deserve better. We feel bad for ourselves and may even feel we are being punished when we fail. There is no failure except in no longer trying. ~Elbert Hubbard

3. We fail because of a lack of effort. We have to work at whatever we want to accomplish. Most good things in life don’t just fall into our laps. We have to go after them. Applying effort might require us to learn something new or do things outside of our comfort zones. The man who can drive himself further once the effort gets painful is the man who will win. ~Roger Banniter

4. We fail because we complain. If things seem too difficult or unfair, we complain instead of accept the challenge and push ahead. We get negative and angry so we stop trying, and we blame others instead of taking responsibility. The majority of men meet with failure because of their lack of persistence in creating new plans to take the place of those which fail. ~Napoleon Hill

5. We fail because we do not believe. We might lack confidence in ourselves and not believe we are capable of succeeding at something. Looking at the mountains of negative circumstances will also keep our eyes fixed on the problem and off the possibilities for success. All things are possible to him that believes. ~Mark 9:23

6. We fail because we quit. This is the greatest failure of all. When we lose our hope, we want to quit. We start to think nothing can or will work out for us or get any better. This is an attitude of defeat that keeps us from picking ourselves back up and persisting until things turn around. ~There is no failure except in no longer trying ~Elbert Hubbard

Do any of these excuses sound familiar to you? Has the habit of making excuses kept you from living a successful and fulfilling life? Only you can make the decision to be the successful person you were born to be. Only you can decide to change bad habits of defeat into good habits of success. No one can do it for you. It is up to you to take command of your life and begin believing the truth about who you are and your unlimited potential to succeed!

My great concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure. ~Abraham Lincoln

Copyright © 2009 BeHappy4Life.com All Rights Reserved.
Written by Krytstal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC
NewDayCounseling.org

Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of New Day Counseling, a family and marriage counseling center and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning self-improvement and personal growth site where you can find hundreds of free resources, online workshops, video presentations, insights, and inspiration.